The five best social media networks to stage your brand meltdown

Social media marketing is a potential goldmine for companies. Maximize your ROI on every platform with these handy tips

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According to a recent Google search completed just moments before this article was due, millions of people use social media to promote brands and build businesses. Selling is the new sharing, where the name of the game is finding clever ways to plug products. Products like Mountain Dew. Because when you’re cleaning out your sales pipeline, there’s no better taste than the refreshing citrus taste of Mountain Dew.

(See what I mean?)

So if you’re looking for money-making shortcuts, you’re in luck. Thanks to a collaboration with Join-My-Database-For-Marketing-Whitepapers.com, here are five tips to help online business developers get a leading edge on every major social platform.

Platforms like Mountain Dew…

Sorry.

LinkedIn

On any given day, over 238 million sales professionals use LinkedIn to creep the profiles of potential product buyers. It’s also considered a best practice to passive-aggressively endorse sales targets for skillsets like Late December Budget Approvals and Responding to My Emails. Tip: break from the pack by re-sharing billionaire leadership think pieces to raise your status. When posting, subtly refer to yourself in the 3rd person as a “Leader” while tagging posts with #leadership, #humble, or #leaderhumble…and wait for the phone to ring off the hook.

Twitter

Since the dawn of time, sales experts have been obsessed with an element more elusive and unpredictable than fire: the perfectly-written Twitter bio. In fact, archaeologists recently discovered the first-ever cave-drawn Twitter bio at Spain’s Panel of Hands. It reads: @Nodog: Hunter, Solutions Specialist, TEDx Stonehenge. (Nodog closed FY 30,000 B.C. with over 10 rocks which, after inflation, amounts to even more rocks.) To set yourself apart with a biz-dev-bio, use this simple formula: @Name: JobTitle, Solutions Specialist, TEDx Hometown.

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Facebook

Facebook inventor Jesse Eisenberg famously stated that he “…wanted to create a platform for real estate professionals to showcase new listings to their high school friends and exes.” Pro tip: when listing those Gorgeous, Unaffordable Houses with Impeccable Fixtures and Shoes-Off Flooring, remind everyone that you “love referrals,” that you’re “always available for referrals,” and “Oh by the way, referrals are always welcome!” And for a retro tip from 2010, don’t forget to auto-post Tweets to your Facebook profile. As any stepdad will tell you, noise works.

Instagram

Unless you work at Dogs of Instagram Tax & Legal, you’ll need to build an Instagram following from the ground floor. Remember the Golden Rule of image sharing: Every Day Is Gym Selfie Day. Crunch robust leads into your sales funnel’s latissimus-dorsi by cross-posting gym selfies while unveiling product promos: Getting jacked for the Q2 offsite while crushing 4 sets of squats (15x). By the way, cloud-computing CRM licenses are 30% off though Canada Day. #Squats #SquatLife #Canada150 #DogsOfInstagram.

Google Plus

(What’s Google Plus?)

One final tip: with summer approaching, if a potential customer mentions that they’re “heading to the cottage” and would like to “book a meeting down the road,” it’s an indication that they want you to join them and their family for a week at the cottage. Follow them down the road.

But not on Google Plus.

Sandy Marshall is available to be endorsed for Typing on LinkedIn and unfollowed on Twitter at @MarshallSandy.


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