Take note, business owners and other capitalist types. Like Warren Buffett, you too can be admired and adored while pursuing profit maximization. Just adopt some of his traits—like a sense of humour. Here are some choice highlights from his recent annual report to Berkshire Hathaway shareholders, mostly from the section where he writes about the Annual Meeting scheduled for the first weekend of May.
“On Sunday at 8 a.m., we will initiate the ‘Berkshire 5K,’ a race starting at the CenturyLink….We will have plenty of categories for competition, including one for the media. (It will be fun to report on their performance.) Regretfully, I will forego running; someone has to man the starting gun …”
“Around 1 p.m. on Sunday, I will begin clerking at [jewellery store] Borsheims. Last year my sales totalled $1.5 million. This year I won’t quit until I hit $2 million. Because I need to leave well before sundown, I will be desperate to do business. Come take advantage of me. Ask for my ‘Crazy Warren’ price …”
“Gorat’s and Piccolo’s will again be open exclusively for Berkshire shareholders on Sunday, May 5th. … At Piccolo’s, order a giant root beer float for dessert. Only sissies get the small one. (I once saw Bill Gates polish off two of the giant variety after a full-course dinner; that’s when I knew he would make a great director.)”
“At 8:30, a new Berkshire movie will be shown. An hour later, we will start the question-and-answer period. … If you decide to leave during the day’s question period, please do so while Charlie [Munger] is talking.”